Balancing Everyday Life with the Creative Life, Part 2 – and a Special Announcement!

Long ago, I decided that my creative life is something that matters enormously to me. It gives my life passion, purpose, meaning, joy, happiness, fulfillment, and a great deal of satisfaction. And there is great magic to be found in those peak creative moments of being “in the flow”, those moments when everything seems to beautifully fall into place.

But there is also great magic to be found in my everyday life as well – spending endless hours talking with my oh so grown-up daughter about life, love, and art, cooking dinner with my husband, having 3 hour dinners in the summer with my husband of 46 years on our tiny patio – candles and wine included, hanging out and getting goofy with my 4 grandkids, holidays, long lunches with special friends. 

I seem to be always working on “balancing my everyday life with my creative life” so that I can find more time for my painting. But, if I haven’t learned anything else in all these years of chasing after that goal, I’ve learned that we can’t “find more time” because it doesn’t exist. Maybe a better idea is to decide that both my everyday life and my creative life matter enormously to me. And rather than drawing a line in the sand between them, a better idea would be to pay attention to the magic and the dragons that are part and parcel to both and slay the dragons that restrict, impinge and generally prevent me from getting on with the magic.  

That immediately leads to the question: How do I decide what to do when “opposite” things that matter to me compete for my time and attention? 

Here is an answer I found in Eric Maisel’s brand new book, “Rethinking Depression”:

“You weigh your actions against a vision you have of the person you would like to be, the person it would make you proudest to be; you take action; you learn from your experience to what extent you guessed right; and you make use of what you’ve learned as you make your next decision. We can give this a shorthand name: the principle of personal pride. You use the principle of personal pride to make your meaning. This may be the beautiful, imperfect, harrowing way – the way of making meaning.”

Special Announcement!

I am excited to announce that Eric Maisel, Creativity Coach, Psychotherapist, and author of over 40 books, will be stopping by my blog on Monday, April 2 on his month-long blog tour to promote his new book, Rethinking Depression. I hope you’ll visit my blog on April 2 for a sneak peek into his new book and to hear more from Eric about how the ideas he presents in the book can be applied to the artist’s journey and living the creative life.

Happy Painting!

Balancing Everyday Life with the Creative Life, Part 1

Well, here it is springtime once again! After an overly busy last year, I spent the early winter months of 2012 quietly. My goal was to hibernate – something that I found hard to achieve and took quite a bit of determination and persistence to pull off. Nevertheless, I intentionally slowed down the pace of my life for a few months and I am pleased. During my time of quiet hibernation I did a lot of thinking, reading, writing, and clarifying my intentions for my everyday life and my creative life this year.  Oh – and I spent a lot of time in my studio as well. I feel a sense of renewal and my creative juices are flowing once again. 

One of my constant challenges is being able to keep painting in the middle of a very busy personal life and a full workshop schedule, and I’m always looking for new strategies for “balancing my everyday life with my creative life.” It’s one thing to be in the studio consistently when life is quiet and slow, it’s quite another to be in there consistently when things heat up and life is super busy. 

However, when I thought a little deeper about it, I realized that regardless of whether my life is super busy, busy, or not so busy – there always seems to be something pulling me away from my painting. I’ve come to realize that sometimes what keeps me out of the studio isn’t the time factor or my busy everyday life at all – it’s me. It’s that part of me that fears that after investing a lot of time and emotional energy in a painting, I might be disappointed – it might not be the masterpiece that a part of me expects and even demands. Or sometimes I fear that I’ll encounter yet another “missing link” that I’ll have to struggle with. That one often leads directly to the part of me that fears (and, by the way, this part of me is pretty sure) that I really don’t know what the heck I’m doing anyway. Then there’s that part of me that fears that no one will like my painting anyway, so why bother – it’s all just a waste of time. And my latest discovery is that although one part of me is totally committed to process-oriented painting and improvisation, another part of me fears entering into unknown territories unless I’m guaranteed successful results in advance. It really is hard to stay put and keep on keeping on when these dragons of fear show up and start wreaking havoc in the studio.  It’s much easier to become immersed in the distractions of everyday life than it is to stay and deal with the dragons that stand at my studio door.  

In his book Coaching the Artist Within, Eric Maisel points out that as a creativity self-coach, you are obliged to become your own fear and anxiety expert, and he shares these 4 tips for becoming that expert: 

  1. Begin by getting in touch with all of the stages of your creative process.
  2. Ask yourself, “What characteristically makes me fearful or causes me anxiety in each of these stages?
  3. Answer the question, “What can I do to effectively deal with these regular, predictable experiences of fear and anxiety? (Your answer might just take the form of “Just be aware of the fear or anxiety and choose not to flee”)
  4. Test your answer the next time you experience fear or anxiety during your creative process.

I’m pretty sure that everyday life will always be busy – there is no escaping it. However, I’m not so sure anymore that the key to a rich and meaningful creative life is balancing everyday life with the creative life. I’m thinking it may have more to do with choosing not to flee and learning how to confront those dragons that show up at the studio door.    

What do you think? What challenges do you face in your creative life, and how do you deal with them?

PS:  In my next post I will continue with the topic Balancing Everyday Life with the Creative Life, and I will also be making an exciting announcement concerning Eric Maisel and my blog. 

Happy Painting!